net-traveller Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 I must admit that I've never heard of 'widdling in cornflakes', as posted on the Money to Burn thread, but I've come across many a strange saying so I got to thinking that it might be interesting to see how many there are. I'm sure that a lot are regional and/or industry specific. A rarity is often referred to as being as rare as hens teeth. An alternative is as rare as rocking horse droppings. For the greater good can be stated as belling the cat. Cold weather can be brass monkeys for which we must thank the Royal Navy and I know the explanation. There are quite a few of military origin. I'd like to know the origins of it'll be rude not to. Now to lower the tone a touch. In the computer industry when the system keeps falling over it's known as the whores drawers, and no it's nothing to do with a bedside cabinet. Anyone else got any they'd like to pass on. :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chas Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 "Having seen more meat on a jockeys whip" is used for a thin person. Fat people are called "Salad dodgers" or " fatter than a butchers dog" An old midlands saying when about to have rain is " its looking black over Bills mothers" and of course a mean person is often refered to as being tighter than a ducks ar**. T.T.F.N. chas. Watch out for any off Michele ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza454 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 Employer talking about a new employee -"He's as much use as a one-legged man in an a**e kicking contest".Employee complaining about having to keep moving from his desk - "I'm up and down more times than a pair of whores drawers". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza454 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 Old lad having a few pints on a Friday night -"I'll be glad when i've had enough, then I can go home". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michele Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 She/He's as useless as a chocolate tea pot . Gottcha CHAS...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza454 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 Another couple -"If wit was s**t, you'd be constipated"."Tha can allus tell a Yorkshireman, but tha can't tell him much". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
derek500 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 He's so unlucky, if he fell into a barrel of bosoms he'd come out sucking his thumb. Or for somebody excited:- He's like a dog with two dicks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyishuk Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 Tradesmans wisdom and knowledge in overcoming a problem. "" More wrinkles than a cats a*se"" As my old govenor used to say, " It's only needs to be rough job, so do the best you can !" Along with; "The lazy man finds the easiest way" He was not much of a touchy feely person ,or high on praise. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michele Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 I dont give a witches tit. what ever one of them is? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza454 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 "If the good Lord decided to give England an enema, then the tube would probably go in Bolton". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michele Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 Silk purse out of a sows ear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michele Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 How about a good one I use for the Social Workers She /he will never make a social worker as long as they have a hole in their **** :D oops bum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
net-traveller Posted March 21, 2007 Author Share Posted March 21, 2007 Seems I've started something. Chas - I know tight as in a crabs nether regions. Either way it's water-tight. As for Bazza - the rocking horse droppings came from Milton Keynes and judging by his responses there's still not a lot to do in that town, or is it a city now? :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 Some we use in Australia...Cunning as a lavvy rat He's built like a brick sh*thouse Flat out like a lizard drinking Done like a dog's dinner Two chances, Buckleys and Nunn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Newell Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 One of my favourites from my father regarding TV reception "I could get a better signal with a piece of wet string" Lower than a snakes undercarriage. As much use as an ashtray on a motorbike. Performing like a fart in a cullender. (To describe an inefficient worker). Like a pig with a shovel. (to describe a sloppy worker). Anybody any ideas as to where the phrase "spoil the ship for a ha'porth of tar" comes from? I can tell you that its not what you might think. D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John H Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 My mom used to say, when talking about the local gossip "She's got a mouth like the parish oven". When my dad was talking about someone who wasn't very good at his job he would say "He's like a mon med o' smoke". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Newell Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 A good one for a lazy worker is; like a man with no arms. Still no takers for the ha'porth of tar saying? D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carolh Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 my nan - would say to stop fidgeting 'you're like a fart in a colander' my mum used to say about my brother - 'he could sleep on a clothes line' same goes for charles :-D and my mum used to say to me 'if you don't stop crying I will give you something to cry for'! Carol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John H Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 About as much use as a one legged bloke in a bum kicking contest. or a one armed paperhanger. Dave, Would it be something to do with Sheep? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza454 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 net-traveller - 2007-03-21 12:18 PM Seems I've started something. Chas - I know tight as in a crabs nether regions. Either way it's water-tight. As for Bazza - the rocking horse droppings came from Milton Keynes and judging by his responses there's still not a lot to do in that town, or is it a city now? :-) It was a choice yesterday of either cleaning the van roof or a couple of hours on the laptop, I chose the latter.Fabulous place MK and loads to do. Been down here 23 years (moved from Gods County), still have to take HRH with me if i'm driving around otherwise I get lost in the grid system....Officially it's still a Town but it certainly deserves City status. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Frank Wilkinson Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 John H - 2007-03-21 3:51 PM About as much use as a one legged bloke in a bum kicking contest. or a one armed paperhanger. Dave, Would it be something to do with Sheep? Don't joke! My first job in my school holidays was as a wash leather wringer-outer for a one-armed window cleaner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel B Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 My Mum used to clop us one and then say "That's a warning, now be careful"!!! 8-) Dave - as for the "spoil the ship for a ha'porth of tar" saying, I believe it comes from the use of tar to help protect sores/wounds on sheep in days gone by, a ship being a sheep. How's that then Dave? Do I get a gold star? :-S How about "spare the rod, spoil the child"? Nothing to do with fishing! (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twooks Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 "spoil the ship for a ha'porth of tar" actually in the Concise Oxford apparently. 'spare the rod etc The notion that children will only flourish if punished, physically or otherwise, for any wrongdoing. Origin From the Bible, Proverbs 13-24 (King James Version): He that spareth his rod hateth his son. how about that, then *-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Jones Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 I'm impressed Jackie! Have you memorised the whole book, or just the useful bits? Tony x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kelly58 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 when I was a youngster if I came home wet through or had fallen in the dyke my mum would always say if you keep getting wet feet you will get something you will never get rid of, well whatever it was I never got it because everything I ever caught colds / mumps /wiels disease /meningitious ,etc I always managed to get rid of it.ps where have the smileys gone to I cant find themkelly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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