nightrider Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 If I were to cut my wifes hands off she would not be able to talk, whenever she talks her arms are going like a wind turbine, the other week in the van she was giving me directions from the map and nearly gave me a black eye, so I bought myself a sat-nav and made her redundant while driving, so what I have got now is a nice soothing female voice saying, in two hundred yards prepare to turn left etc. Her daughter is different in as much that when she is talking you have to make an appointment to get a word in edgeways or stick your hand up to ask Miss a question like you used to do at school. I reckon if the Central Electric Generating board were to wire up a generator to my wife she would create enough energy to heat, light and power a small village. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davenewellhome Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 Sounds like you really love your family Malcolm ;-) . Happy christmas :D ,D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michele Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 Never mind Malcolm thats why you have the forum to get away for a while :D but what would you do without them :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malc d Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 ................ and Malcolms are usually so tolerant. ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michele Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 Not my old man :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted December 26, 2008 Author Share Posted December 26, 2008 Not only do I have the wife and daughter to contend with I also have my 90 years old mother in law who lives with us. Night and day she is forever hoovering, polishing and dusting, dont worry about chemical warfare in the event of any conflict, she has disinfectants that will kill off all known germs and bacteria. She is the last one in bed after she has mopped the utility room floor, the downstairs loo floor, the back porch floor and the kitchen floor, I know exactly where I would like to stick that Dyson. She was moaning this morning that she nearly fell off the toilet seat cos the seat brackets had come loose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malc d Posted December 27, 2008 Share Posted December 27, 2008 knight of the road - 2008-12-26 10:17 PM Not only do I have the wife and daughter to contend with I also have my 90 years old mother in law who lives with us. Night and day she is forever hoovering, polishing and dusting, dont worry about chemical warfare in the event of any conflict, she has disinfectants that will kill off all known germs and bacteria. She is the last one in bed after she has mopped the utility room floor, the downstairs loo floor, the back porch floor and the kitchen floor, I know exactly where I would like to stick that Dyson. She was moaning this morning that she nearly fell off the toilet seat cos the seat brackets had come loose. Well ... in that case ... .....any man who is outnumbered three to one in his own home by women should be allowed to get grumpy ! :-( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hymer C 9. Posted December 27, 2008 Share Posted December 27, 2008 What a vivid picture you have painted of life in your house Knight, I would love to see one of Howies cartoons depicting it, sounds like fun :D Carol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel B Posted December 27, 2008 Share Posted December 27, 2008 knight of the road - 2008-12-26 10:17 PM Not only do I have the wife and daughter to contend with I also have my 90 years old mother in law who lives with us. Night and day she is forever hoovering, polishing and dusting, dont worry about chemical warfare in the event of any conflict, she has disinfectants that will kill off all known germs and bacteria. She is the last one in bed after she has mopped the utility room floor, the downstairs loo floor, the back porch floor and the kitchen floor, I know exactly where I would like to stick that Dyson. She was moaning this morning that she nearly fell off the toilet seat cos the seat brackets had come loose. Malcolm ... sounds like you didn't untighten the brackets sufficiently .... :D Only kidding!!!!!!!! 8-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted December 27, 2008 Author Share Posted December 27, 2008 Before I married my wife I called into my future mother-in-laws house to do a bit of a job, over a cup of tea she asked me what were my intentions towards her daughter? I honestly said that I had never given it a thought, she then said, marry my daughter and I will see you right, to which I thought, oooor might be onto a good thing here, we duly got married and five minutes after signing the register I asked my mother-in-law when could I expect my divvy to which she replied what divvy? I reminded her of what she said and she said "you rotten liar" I never said such a thing, she then went on to say that she had warned her daughter about marrying me as I looked like a wrong,un, what a con artist she is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.