nightrider Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 At this time of the year I call on my garden customers to check out what work wants doing for the coming season. This is also the time when I find out how many of my elderly customers have gone up to the great garden in the sky over the winter. Up to now I have lost two and from the look of old Tommy I dont think it will be long before he goes on that final journey, it certainly makes you feel sad to have lost not just a customer of long standing but a friend, very sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tracker Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 We used to run a village Post Office and every winter we lost so many lovely people good friends and customers it was very sad - but why is it that the miserable sods seem to live forever - was someone trying to, a] tell me something or, b] punish me? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mick H. Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Tracker - 2009-01-16 1:06 PM We used to run a village Post Office and every winter we lost so many lovely people good friends and customers it was very sad - but why is it that the miserable sods seem to live forever - was someone trying to, a] tell me something or, b] punish me? Creaking wheels go on forever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted January 16, 2009 Author Share Posted January 16, 2009 My mother in law who lives with us is 90 years old, she is fit, healthy, robust and eats two taters more than a pig, still got all her own teeth and is still driving her Ford Fiesta, she took it for an MOT yesterday and it passed. The MOT man said that the front offside tyre will need to be renewed shortly and also the nearside shocker, she said that she is going to take advantage of the depressed car market and buy herself another later model car, they breed em' tough where she comes from (Fleetwood) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted January 16, 2009 Author Share Posted January 16, 2009 Last year I was working on the garden of one of my elderly customers (late 80's) when she slipped off the front step injuring herself badly, I called for an ambulance, I then had to secure the house and get in touch with her only son, the following day he rang me to tell me that she had died, he was beside himself with grief and thanked me profusely for what I had done. He asked me to carry on with looking after the garden up until the house was sold, some months later when I was on holiday in the van, George's wife rang me to tell me that he had suffered a massive heart attack and died, what a shock that was to me. Like I said, with long standing customers you build up a raport and they become friends and its sad when they go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rainbow-Chasers Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 What annoyed me was when the government announced the number of eldery that were expected to die from cold over the winter. I thought that was damn appalling! No one should be expected to die, or be treated as collateral damage over the winter period. No one in the UK should die of cold or hunger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kelly58 Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Years ago I worked with an old chap who used to say life is like climbing up a ladder as you step up another person steps on behind you and this goe's on until you reach the top you cannot go down because there are people behind you your only alternative is to " Drop Off " you just hope its a bloody long ladder , just about sums up life there's no going back in life so greet every day as if its your last.http://www.outandaboutlive.co.uk/forums/images/emoticons/icon_razz.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davenewellhome Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Two days ago I was informed that an ex business neighbour had passed away. I have to be honest and say that it was mostly down to himself as he was a seriously heavy drinker and 18 months ago he was diagnosed with liver problems but its still sad to see them drop off the tree. Two years or so ago I had a customer from the south coast who had some rare blood disorder and the prognosis was that he had an unknown but relatively short life expectation of less than one year. The good news was that he wouldn't suffer, he'd just not wake up one morning! I often wonder if he's still seeing the morning sky and saying a private thank you. D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bob b Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 I'm not frightened of death.......its the dying part that worries me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BGD Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 I've seen three people die. Two I would not want to talk about here. But the first person I ever saw die was at Gloucester Leisure Centre. We used to go there when I was a teenager for table-tennis coaching (many many moons ago I was pretty handy at table tennis). I must have been about 14. On the way to the changing rooms one day, as we were passing the indoor bowls rink, a guy who was playing bowls just dropped dead. In his 60's maybe. As he bowled he just keeled over and fell down stone dead. No lingering. No thrashing about. Instant. Paramedics played about with him for a bit, but he'd gone. In a second. We're all gonna go. There's nothing to worry about with it. But that's the way I'd like to go. Just a simple "bang" and you've finally completed the great adventure that is this life. You may as well really enjoy life to the full. 'Cos whatever you do, no-one gets out alive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted January 17, 2009 Author Share Posted January 17, 2009 I can't make my mind up whether it is better to go out with a bang, a massive heart attack and you are gone within seconds or to go after a short illness? If you are taken with a bang instantly I think that sudden void and emptyness for your loved ones would be unbearable, God knows how you would get your life back on track. The lady who phoned me up to tell me that George her husband died is devastated, she told me that he got up a 8am went into the bathroom walked back into the bedroom and just crumpled to the floor, stone dead just like that right in front of her eyes as she was dressing, that is hard. A persons time on earth is not even a blink of an eye, I consider myself to be very fortunate, I am nearly the biblical three score and ten if I reach that I will be quite happy any longer than that and I will consider it to be a bonus. who started this maudlin subject anyway? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted January 17, 2009 Author Share Posted January 17, 2009 On a lighter note, talking to my son-in-law who is a methodist minister we were discussing pre-paid funerals, I said that I wanted a Vikings funeral and that I wanted my mortal remains to be cast adrift on the river Irwell and the boat set on fire so that the boat and my remains sink gently to the river bed. The following day my son-in-law told me that he had discussed my last request with Mr sillett the local funeral director who said that Viking long boats were in short supply and hard to come by, but he could cobble a raft together using four old oil drums and a few scaffolding planks tied together to make a bier, they could then float the raft to the bridge on Blackburn St and in a fitting tribute they could lower a type 3 Volkswagon campervan onto the raft with my body laid out on the rock-n-roll bed covered in flowers, a few bails of straw from farmer Jacks, half a gallon of petrol and a match should should be a fitting tribute, Mr Sillett said if I were to pay up front with folding money he could give me a handsome discount. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted January 17, 2009 Author Share Posted January 17, 2009 Rainbow-Chasers' - 2009-01-16 8:21 PM What annoyed me was when the government announced the number of eldery that were expected to die from cold over the winter. I thought that was damn appalling! No one should be expected to die, or be treated as collateral damage over the winter period. No one in the UK should die of cold or hunger. It is a true fact that many pensioners are going without food in order to pay gas bills in order to keep warm, many peoples bank accounts are being raided by gas companies increasing the direct debits without the consumers consent. It is also a gross injustice that consumers who in order to keep control of their spending who use pre-payment card meters pay far in excess of consumers who pay by direct debit, basically it is a case of the poorer you are the more you pay, totally wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Syd Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 I was at a friends funeral the other day and after it was over my wife said to me "its not worth you going home is it ?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tracker Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Syd - 2009-01-17 6:15 PM I was at a friends funeral the other day and after it was over my wife said to me "its not worth you going home is it ?" Well - don't keep us in suspense - was it worth going home Syd! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel B Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Unfortunately we've just had to have one of our pets put down today, Amber, our pet rat. She was 2 years, 7 months which is fairly old for a rat. She was going a bit scatty anyway (loosing her marbles) as old pets can tend to do, but was happy nonetheless, still eating and waddling around contentedly. Then last night she started having breathing problems, nothing major, but she just wasn't quite right although she was eating etc fine, this morning she was a little bit worse and I rang the vets, by the time I got there, about 20 mins later, she was having to open her mouth to breath and the prognosis was not going to be very good, no matter what we did. Not wanting to see her suffer she was put down (our vet always gives little pets some anaesthetic gas first to calm them and make them sleepy before injecting them) so at least she won't have felt any pain. She's now buried in the garden next to her sister, Misty, who we had to have put down in France in September. I don't regret having them, but I wish they lived longer as you do get so attached to them, they really do have personalities and are like having mini dogs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colin Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 knight of the road - 2009-01-17 1:15 AM I can't make my mind up whether it is better to go out with a bang, a massive heart attack and you are gone within seconds or to go after a short illness? If you are taken with a bang instantly I think that sudden void and emptyness for your loved ones would be unbearable, God knows how you would get your life back on track. Well consider this. My father had been cutting lawn, then a trip to doctors to pick up mothers tablets, then watching tv, he died of heart attack that night(within minutes,not seconds) just a couple of weeks after being told he was in reasonably good health. Grandmother had cancer, tough as old boots, was in hospital for only a week, on the last night she was being pumped full of morphine, enough to knock out a horse, in an attempt to control pain, but she still tried to talk to me, but we couldn't quite comunicate, I was chucked out at end of visiting hours not knowing if she was conscious or not. I've come to terms with my father death, don't think I'll ever come to terms with my grandmother death. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Syd Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Yes, Im still here (I think) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel B Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 I don't know if you ever really come to terms with losing someone, or something, you just learn to live with it, accept there's nothing you can do to change it, and go on with your own life as best you can. Just remember the good times and try to forget the not-so-good times. Never really came to terms with losing my 17 year old nephew many moons ago, losing my Mum in Law a couple of years ago, and just before Christmas a chap who I used to work with (I work with his daughter now) who was an absolute bundle of fun but suffered from depression and very bad health in his later years. We still miss dreadfully some of our pets, especially little Piggy (dog) who thought she was human ... maybe more so than some as we don't have kids so our pets really were/are our 'family'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J9withdogs Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 knight of the road - 2009-01-17 1:15 AM I can't make my mind up whether it is better to go out with a bang, a massive heart attack and you are gone within seconds or to go after a short illness? If you are taken with a bang instantly I think that sudden void and emptyness for your loved ones would be unbearable, God knows how you would get your life back on track. I think it's better for the relatives if they have time to say their 'goodbyes' but not necessarily for the person that dies. It's been nearly 12 months since I held my dear Dad while he passed away. He had been poorly for several years and had lost most of his faculties and therefore his dignity. I can take comfort that he didn't die alone or surrounded by strangers, but it still hurts me to think about how much he had to suffer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ROON Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 My friend had experience of both, and whilst she says she can come to terms with not saying goodbye she will never come to terms with having to watch her dad die slowly and without dignity and with fear. I just want to go quickly. When I was sat in a waiting room with my dad about 18 months ago, waiting to go in for him to be told he had a cancer they could not operate on and knowing he could not handle it (I had already been told) ..... I watched him fall asleep after a two hour wait. I prayed to God that he would not wake up and that he would die in his sleep so he didn't have to face what we are going through now. I even prepared how to tell mum so the shock was as easy as possible for her. I BEGGED God to take him peacefully .... needless to say He didn't listen again. I still live each day hoping that maybe he will go quickly before the cancer takes over completely. Sorry if that offends anyone. Joy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted January 19, 2009 Author Share Posted January 19, 2009 ROON - 2009-01-19 3:29 PM My friend had experience of both, and whilst she says she can come to terms with not saying goodbye she will never come to terms with having to watch her dad die slowly and without dignity and with fear. I just want to go quickly. When I was sat in a waiting room with my dad about 18 months ago, waiting to go in for him to be told he had a cancer they could not operate on and knowing he could not handle it (I had already been told) ..... I watched him fall asleep after a two hour wait. I prayed to God that he would not wake up and that he would die in his sleep so he didn't have to face what we are going through now. I even prepared how to tell mum so the shock was as easy as possible for her. I BEGGED God to take him peacefully .... needless to say He didn't listen again. I still live each day hoping that maybe he will go quickly before the cancer takes over completely. Sorry if that offends anyone. Joy It shouldn't offend anyone Joy, we all face it sooner or later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colin Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 ROON - 2009-01-19 3:29 PM My friend had experience of both, and whilst she says she can come to terms with not saying goodbye she will never come to terms with having to watch her dad die slowly and without dignity and with fear. I just want to go quickly. When I was sat in a waiting room with my dad about 18 months ago, waiting to go in for him to be told he had a cancer they could not operate on and knowing he could not handle it (I had already been told) ..... I watched him fall asleep after a two hour wait. I prayed to God that he would not wake up and that he would die in his sleep so he didn't have to face what we are going through now. I even prepared how to tell mum so the shock was as easy as possible for her. I BEGGED God to take him peacefully .... needless to say He didn't listen again. I still live each day hoping that maybe he will go quickly before the cancer takes over completely. Sorry if that offends anyone. Joy I'm with you 100%, the 'no publicity' box has been ticked so I have to be carefull what I say, but it is remarkable how some one can put on a brave face for an hour or so when visitors are about, but when they are gone it's top up the morphine time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted January 19, 2009 Author Share Posted January 19, 2009 When my mother was in hospital dying of cancer, she was in terrible pain, no hope of recovery and no quality of life, I am not afraid to say that I went up to the head nurse or whatever she was, discussed the situation with her and asked her to top up the dosage of the morphine, the nurse explained the risks which I accepted. The following evening in the presence of me and my sister my mother passed away peacefully in her sleep, whether or not the nurse did what I asked I dont know but I have know doubt things like that happen, an animal is not allowed to suffer so why should a human being. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BGD Posted January 19, 2009 Share Posted January 19, 2009 It seems that in many cases, despite the cretins in the courtrooms, there are actually human beings in hospitals, who actually grasp that it ain't the length of life but the qulity of life that's important. And sometimes the only humane, and human, thing to do, is to draw that life to a close peacefully and painlessly. Stupid, self-righteous people, who have no concept of what REALLY goes on, march around with placards extolling the "sanctity of life", brainwashed by ancient quasi-religious mumbo-jumbo; and demanding that whatever any other person may want to do with their own life, these parading idiots know better and can take that right away. People who do have a concept of what REALLY goes on, simply quietly, allow the dying person to leave with dignity, and without pain. They have my unmitigated support. They are true humans. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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