CliveH Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 Phone rings, woman answers. The pervert, with heavy breathing, says, "Have you got a tight unshaven c**t....?" Woman replies, "Yes, he's watching telly. Who shall I say is calling?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tracker Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 Quiet day at the office today eh Clive!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donna miller Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 Nice one :D :D :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CliveH Posted January 5, 2012 Author Share Posted January 5, 2012 Never hat busy this early in the Year Tracker And sorry for the word use Donna - I have always hated that word - but in the context of this joke it works well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LordThornber Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 Quality Clive. Martyn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightrider Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 CliveH - 2012-01-05 2:01 PM Phone rings, woman answers. The pervert, with heavy breathing, says, "Have you got a tight unshaven c**t....?" Woman replies, "Yes, he's watching telly. Who shall I say is calling?" Surprised at you Clive (lol) (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tracker Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 But not so surprised that you could resist the urge to re-post it eh Malcolm!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Mrs Batty Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 I was in Tesco shopping with the wife and she turned round and said ' your such a lazy pig ' I was so shocked I nearly fell out of the trolley !! I found my first grey pube today. Normally things like this dont bother me , but it was in a Greggs pasty . A man sunbathes in the nude and burns his penis. His doctor tells him to dip it in a saucer of milk to ease the pain. Later his blonde wife comes home to find him with his willy in the saucer of milk. ' OMG ' she says ' I always wondered how you reloaded those things ' ! Another busy day in the office. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowtelse2do Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 This is true...just happened today. Had to go and get our new passport photos down in one of those photo booth's at Tescos. I went in first, put the £5 in the slot, a voice then starts giving you instructions, take your hat off, look straight at the camera..etc. I then started laughing and couldn't stop, Eve said "shut up everyone is staring at us, and what the hell are you laughing about" I said, "well there's only me going abroad this year by the looks of it" why ? she asked, I replied that one of the instructions said " to keep mouth shut" 6.23pm and no tea yet, I think she has one on her (lol) (lol) Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LordThornber Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 nowtelse2do - 2012-01-05 6:23 PM This is true...just happened today. Had to go and get our new passport photos down in one of those photo booth's at Tescos. I went in first, put the £5 in the slot, a voice then starts giving you instructions, take your hat off, look straight at the camera..etc. I then started laughing and couldn't stop, Eve said "shut up everyone is staring at us, and what the hell are you laughing about" I said, "well there's only me going abroad this year by the looks of it" why ? she asked, I replied that one of the instructions said " to keep mouth shut" 6.23pm and no tea yet, I think she has one on her (lol) (lol) Dave Love it Dave, what a corker :D :D :D :D Martyn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donna miller Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 CliveH - 2012-01-05 2:58 PM And sorry for the word use Donna - I have always hated that word - but in the context of this joke it works well. Clive, absolutely no need, believe me, when I was still in the haulage game I heard that word on a daily basis and in every context you could imagine. My take is that although thoroughly ? vulgar, it is merely letters strung together to form a word, it is in ever increasing use, and has always been in certain circles, and to treat it as such I learned very early on in that industry, that without a thick skin I wouldn't get far. Being uptight about language being used between drivers, workshop mechanics etc, would only get me a reputation of being far too prudish to run a transport operation, however, woe betide any driver who used any sort of bad language in my transport office where there was other girls working or customers visiting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave225 Posted January 5, 2012 Share Posted January 5, 2012 I have realised that the younger generation know words I had only heard in rather restricted company and even the females seem to delight in using words i would never have thought possible from the 'fairer sex'. But then again many of them miss that category nowadays. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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