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She was shopping at the local supermarket where she selected:


A half-gallon of 2% milk,


A carton of eggs,


A quart of orange juice,


A head of romaine lettuce,


A 2 lb. can of coffee, and


A 1 lb. package of bacon.




As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk

standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.


While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated,

"You must be single."


She was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the

derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at the six

items on the

belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could

have tipped off the drunk to her marital status.


Curiosity getting the better of her, She said: "Well, you know what, you're

absolutely right. But how on earth did you know that?"


The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly"



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As the newlyweds stood on the church step having their photos taken the bride looked lovenly into her husbands eyes & said "darling wont it be wonderfull tonight after waiting this long" ? Bugger tonight he replied, whats wrong with this afternoon ? (lol)
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