Guest pelmetman Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 Horace has gone in for a face lift, new cross member new bonnet striker plate and 2 new wings.......a bit extreme as he's only got a couple of zits showing :$............but the cross member did need welding at the last MOT *-)........ He's being sorted in Poole not far from where he was built :D..........but I have a Enterprise rental for a fortnight :D................Its a Corsa that had 4 miles on the clock :-D........Wow my first new car to drive since I bought my last in 1989............my last new vehicle was my delivery Transit I bought new in 99........... ;-) So I was looking forward to see what more than a decade had done to improve the motoring experience B-) Well..........once the paperwork was done and we'd run the engine for a while to prove that they'd put 12 quid of fuel in :-S.......... apparently being a new car it takes a while to realize its been fed :D............after 5 minutes gave up waiting *-)............I said I believe you and drove off... and fair enough 10 minutes later it did show nearly a quarter full :D..................First impressions was its quite nippy at low speeds, acceleration is non existent above 60 in 5th but then I expect the engine is less than half the size of my Rover ;-)............everything is well screwed together nothing rattles or squeaks, which allows you to listen to the road noise uninterrupted :-S When we stopped for lunch managed to work the radio out enough to get radio 2 B-)..... 240 miles later...............would I buy one...........No!!.......If someone gave me one I'd sell it *-)..........Who ever designed the seats wants shooting!!............made of concrete and designed to keep osteopaths in work for decades 8-)........ Had to move my Rover Sterling to get it on the drive............Ooooh it was like relaxing in your favorite leather armchair after the Corsa :D.... So no..... after more than a decade the motoring experience hasn't improved as far as I'm concerned ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowtelse2do Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 Oh how sad Dave, Horace having 2 new wings. Has he gone to heaven ? :-( Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pelmetman Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 nowtelse2do - 2012-06-18 7:26 PM Oh how sad Dave, Horace having 2 new wings. Has he gone to heaven ? :-( Dave It's alright Dave he's having a face lift............age....... it's a terrible thing ;-)......but a bit of Botox and filler and he'll be just like new..............funny thing was another transit camper turned up to have work done a 99 A/S Polenesia...........Horace looked in much better nick than the A/S did ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
josie gibblebucket Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 He will look very posh! I expect he will want you to show him off!!! :D Just make sure you don't get done for kerb crawling as you drive him proudly around :D :D :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowtelse2do Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 WOW..!! Face lift eh. What with a new pram on the back as well, he will be strutting (or spluttering) around like a proud father. :D Dave PS. When are you booked in :-> :-> :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MandyAndy Posted June 19, 2012 Share Posted June 19, 2012 Looking at OP reminded me of being at school where teacher put a picture or left a gap for you to fill in the missing words, loved it. :-D Nice to find a man with a heart. Mandy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pelmetman Posted June 19, 2012 Share Posted June 19, 2012 nowtelse2do - 2012-06-18 9:23 PM PS. When are you booked in :-> :-> :D Very funny Dave :D................I'll have you know the fat bald bloke look is very trendy ;-)....... You only need to look around your local town to see how many of us trendsetters are about (lol) (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowtelse2do Posted June 19, 2012 Share Posted June 19, 2012 Mandy&Andy - 2012-06-19 6:41 AM Nice to find a man with a heart. Mandy Thanks Mandy, much appreciated... :-D Dave...I'm a little jealous. You must be a picture around town. even a model dare I say....especially in them shorts. (lol) (lol) Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pelmetman Posted June 19, 2012 Share Posted June 19, 2012 nowtelse2do - 2012-06-19 5:56 PM Mandy&Andy - 2012-06-19 6:41 AM Nice to find a man with a heart. Mandy Thanks Mandy, much appreciated... :-D Dave...I'm a little jealous. You must be a picture around town. even a model dare I say....especially in them shorts. (lol) (lol) Dave I'm thinking of having my bits "Dicjazzled" ;-).........I'm on the cutting edge of fashion dontcha know :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowtelse2do Posted June 19, 2012 Share Posted June 19, 2012 pelmetman - 2012-06-19 6:07 PM I'm thinking of having my bits "Dicjazzled" ;-).........I'm on the cutting edge of fashion dontcha know :D Never come across the expression "Dicjazzled" Is this some kind of Lincolnshire Medieval Torture you indulge in........like piercing certain parts of one's anatomy and enjoying it 8-) Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pelmetman Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 nowtelse2do - 2012-06-19 10:22 PM Never come across the expression "Dicjazzled" Is this some kind of Lincolnshire Medieval Torture you indulge in........like piercing certain parts of one's anatomy and enjoying it 8-) Dave According to Wiktionary..... vajazzle [edit]English [edit]Etymology Blend of vagina and bedazzle [edit]Verb vajazzle (third-person singular simple present vajazzles, present participle vajazzling, simple past and past participle vajazzled) (slang) To decorate a woman's vagina or pubic area with jewels. If its good enough for the ladies ;-)....................then I'm up for a bit of mens lib :D.............. So I've invented Dicjazzled.......another business opportunity which will complement my Pelmet & Pouffe empire...... (lol) (lol) (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
josie gibblebucket Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 Hope you won't be using the same big upholstery needles when you do your dicjazzling 8-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowtelse2do Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 pelmetman - 2012-06-20 8:43 AM (slang) To decorate a woman's vagina or pubic area with jewels. If its good enough for the ladies ;-)....................then I'm up for a bit of mens lib :D.............. So I've invented Dicjazzled.......another business opportunity which will complement my Pelmet & Pouffe empire...... (lol) (lol) (lol) So a new outlet, pin cushions and ring pieces. Didn't Sue once let it slip that you needed a pin to find yours.. (lol) Which reminded me of Kenny Everett dressed as a punk with all the zips he was trying to undue when he went to the toilet but failed to find the one needed and p****d himself. How do these people go on with all the piercings on the outside and in, (so I'm told) manage when they have to go for any X rays. Must take them a hour to get undressed. "Have you any metal objects on you"? "Yes, up my nose, through my nose, belly button, and a vagina one" "Right take them all out except the vaginal one. I'll do that" :D :D Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pelmetman Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 Makes you wonder who came up the idea 8-)................ I can only imagine it was a woman sat somewhere with a load of spare crystals, thinking what shall I do with these? :-S...................I know I'll glue them to my f***y 8-) .............................and I thought I had a weird imagination (lol) (lol) (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowtelse2do Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 Dave, I don't think for one moment anyone would question your weird imagination :D So don't start worrying about that. Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tracker Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 Do let us know at what state of 'expansion' you get yourself dazzled as whilst you would not want bald spots to appear at certain stages neither would you wish to spend more than you need to on an ageing implement! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pelmetman Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 First mistake 8-).................don't use a hot glue gun :$ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowtelse2do Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 Staple gun any good..?? Press stud's. That'ud fetch tears 't' eye's, Have you seen how they anchor (nautical term just for you Dave) them down, a die and big hammer. :'( Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tracker Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 Try clear silicone as it should stretch if it ever gets called upon so to do - plus you could always make your own waterproof casing to protect the crown jewels! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pelmetman Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 Cant use a staple gun on crystals Dave.....they'd shatter *-).........silicone might work though Rich ;-)...... I hope to be a diamond geezer soon :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tracker Posted June 20, 2012 Share Posted June 20, 2012 Adds a whole new meaning to the word 'stud' doesn't it!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel B Posted June 21, 2012 Share Posted June 21, 2012 ... what a 'riviting' thread this is!!! :D Dave ... be careful where you stick the gems ... never mind Kenny Everett trying to find the right zip, you might have trouble if you stick something in the wrong place and 'bung' yourself up ... you could end up firing gems everywhere!!! (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pelmetman Posted June 22, 2012 Share Posted June 22, 2012 I blame that Nowtelse ;-)............I start a sensible thread and he leads me astray :D..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowtelse2do Posted June 22, 2012 Share Posted June 22, 2012 pelmetman - 2012-06-22 7:25 AM I blame that Nowtelse ;-)............I start a sensible thread and he leads me astray :D..... 8-) Didn't take much did it :D All I did was ask a thoroughly throughout sensible and in good faith question, and you come back with "Dicjazzled" If you had replied with an answer, Penis Piercing :'( then with me being a shy and sensitive person would have immediately thought that Penis Piercing was an author of gardening book's. But obviously your reply makes out that you are a Gem Collector or Germ Collector :-D :-D Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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