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Attacked with deadly weapon


antony1969

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Posted

After a viscous attack at a Canvey Island School where one pupil suffered eye injuries the school has seen sense and banned ( not before time ) the deadly weapons that caused the injury .

Teachers and governors took the drastic step to ban triangle shaped flapjacks and now only have square pieces on school property .

Well done to all of those involved in this decision and in doing so no way means you have far too much time on your hands .

Guest pelmetman
Posted
To think they're being paid to teach kids 8-)..............it explains a lot actually :D
Posted

It clearly wasn't Maths teachers who made the decision - with four corners there is 33% more chance of injury. Any fool knows they ought to have ordered round flapjacks (lol)

 

 

PS It's a good job they haven't seen my wife's custard - now that really is lethal!

 

 

Posted
John 47 - 2013-03-25 7:14 PM

 

It clearly wasn't Maths teachers who made the decision - with four corners there is 33% more chance of injury. Any fool knows they ought to have ordered round flapjacks (lol)

 

 

PS It's a good job they haven't seen my wife's custard - now that really is lethal!

 

 

Terrible at maths but should that not read 25% 8-) I stand to be corrected.

 

Dave

Posted
nowtelse2do - 2013-03-25 7:23 PM

 

John 47 - 2013-03-25 7:14 PM

 

It clearly wasn't Maths teachers who made the decision - with four corners there is 33% more chance of injury. Any fool knows they ought to have ordered round flapjacks (lol)

 

 

PS It's a good job they haven't seen my wife's custard - now that really is lethal!

 

 

Terrible at maths but should that not read 25% 8-) I stand to be corrected.

 

 

Dave

 

Oh dear....... jokes tend not to be funny if you have to explain them (lol)

 

 

But here goes..................Triangles have three corners. If you add one to make the figure a square that is an increase of one over three, or 33.33%. Funnily enough, though, if you them remove one from that square to turn it back into a triangle, then that is indeed a reduction of one over four, or 25%. Anybody still awake?

Posted
John 47 - 2013-03-25 7:34 PM

 

nowtelse2do - 2013-03-25 7:23 PM

 

John 47 - 2013-03-25 7:14 PM

 

It clearly wasn't Maths teachers who made the decision - with four corners there is 33% more chance of injury. Any fool knows they ought to have ordered round flapjacks (lol)

 

 

PS It's a good job they haven't seen my wife's custard - now that really is lethal!

 

 

Terrible at maths but should that not read 25% 8-) I stand to be corrected.

 

 

Dave

 

Oh dear....... jokes tend not to be funny if you have to explain them (lol)

 

 

But here goes..................Triangles have three corners. If you add one to make the figure a square that is an increase of one over three, or 33.33%. Funnily enough, though, if you them remove one from that square to turn it back into a triangle, then that is indeed a reduction of one over four, or 25%. Anybody still awake?

 

Come on guys , the serious point is these weapons are off the streets and that surely is all that matters

Posted
John 47 - 2013-03-25 7:14 PM

 

It clearly wasn't Maths teachers who made the decision - with four corners there is 33% more chance of injury. Any fool knows they ought to have ordered round flapjacks (lol)

 

 

PS It's a good job they haven't seen my wife's custard - now that really is lethal!

 

I bet you daren't show her this post >:-)
Posted
malc d - 2013-03-25 7:59 PM

 

Surely, instead of merely changing the shape of these weapons - the children should have been banned from throwing them.

 

 

;-)

 

That's not the answer , I think a telling off and then maybe a friendship bonding session at Alton Towers would be more of a punishment .

Posted
skyrider - 2013-03-25 7:52 PM

 

John 47 - 2013-03-25 7:14 PM

 

It clearly wasn't Maths teachers who made the decision - with four corners there is 33% more chance of injury. Any fool knows they ought to have ordered round flapjacks (lol)

 

 

PS It's a good job they haven't seen my wife's custard - now that really is lethal!

 

I bet you daren't show her this post >:-)

 

I may be mad but I'm not daft!! (lol)

Posted
John 47 - 2013-03-25 7:34 PM

 

Oh dear....... jokes tend not to be funny if you have to explain them (lol)

 

 

But here goes..................Triangles have three corners. If you add one to make the figure a square that is an increase of one over three, or 33.33%. Funnily enough, though, if you them remove one from that square to turn it back into a triangle, then that is indeed a reduction of one over four, or 25%. Anybody still awake?

 

Ah, gotcha. Like I said, terrible at maths, that's one of the reasons I went bankrupt once.

 

Actually, I was trying to save you from the mob. :D

 

Dave

Posted
nowtelse2do - 2013-03-25 8:31 PM

 

Ah, gotcha. Like I said, terrible at maths, that's one of the reasons I went bankrupt once.

 

Actually, I was trying to save you from the mob. :D

 

Dave

 

Thanks - but with my wife's custard in hand, I'm willing to face any mob (lol) (lol) (lol)

Posted
malc d - 2013-03-25 7:59 PM

 

Surely, instead of merely changing the shape of these weapons - the children should have been banned from throwing them.

 

 

;-)

 

I have already reported you to the Politically Correct Brigade Malcolm for voicing inappropriate and unhelpful restrictions on peoples human right to throw whatever object they feel suitable at the time. Surely you must realise that it is Society's job to make sure that the objects are not potential harmful.

 

The taxpayer funds the wonderful people that police the dangerous world of cake fighting.

 

As for the suggestion by others that round FlapJacks only should be used this is also inappropriate as a thin oven hardened flapjack can be used as an effective and lethal Frisbee.

 

I am stunned at the complete lack responsible posting on this important subject.

 

You should be ashamed.

 

>:-(

 

 

Guest pelmetman
Posted
CliveH - 2013-03-25 11:42 PM

 

malc d - 2013-03-25 7:59 PM

 

Surely, instead of merely changing the shape of these weapons - the children should have been banned from throwing them.

 

 

;-)

 

I have already reported you to the Politically Correct Brigade Malcolm for voicing inappropriate and unhelpful restrictions on peoples human right to throw whatever object they feel suitable at the time. Surely you must realise that it is Society's job to make sure that the objects are not potential harmful.

 

The taxpayer funds the wonderful people that police the dangerous world of cake fighting.

 

As for the suggestion by others that round FlapJacks only should be used this is also inappropriate as a thin oven hardened flapjack can be used as an effective and lethal Frisbee.

 

I am stunned at the complete lack responsible posting on this important subject.

 

You should be ashamed.

 

>:-(

 

 

Your right Clive ;-) ................angings to good fer the likes of them :D

Posted
CliveH - 2013-03-25 11:42 PM

 

As for the suggestion by others that round FlapJacks only should be used this is also inappropriate as a thin oven hardened flapjack can be used as an effective and lethal Frisbee.

 

I am stunned at the complete lack responsible posting on this important subject.

 

You should be ashamed.

 

>:-(

 

 

Oven-hardened! Oven-hardened! Are you mad? Have you not read the Geneva Convention? Oven-hardened comes under the same heading as water-boarding (para 23, subsection 2b, para 3, line 27). I have forwarded your post to the Governors of Canvey Island School - they should be round soon! :-D

Posted
CliveH - 2013-03-25 11:42 PM

 

malc d - 2013-03-25 7:59 PM

 

Surely, instead of merely changing the shape of these weapons - the children should have been banned from throwing them.

 

 

;-)

 

I have already reported you to the Politically Correct Brigade Malcolm for voicing inappropriate and unhelpful restrictions on peoples human right to throw whatever object they feel suitable at the time. Surely you must realise that it is Society's job to make sure that the objects are not potential harmful.

 

The taxpayer funds the wonderful people that police the dangerous world of cake fighting.

 

As for the suggestion by others that round FlapJacks only should be used this is also inappropriate as a thin oven hardened flapjack can be used as an effective and lethal Frisbee.

 

I am stunned at the complete lack responsible posting on this important subject.

 

You should be ashamed.

 

>:-(

 

 

In light of what you say Clive I realise that my suggestion of ' banning ' the children from throwing flapjacks may have gone a bit too far,

( Although NOT as extreme as Antonys' idea of telling them off ).

 

 

:-|

Posted

You shouldn't be belittling what could be a life threatening situation :-(

 

Some of you will remember the well reported death of a milkman after he was hit by a rock cake in the chest and then a stale pork pie in the eye.

 

The full report can still be found on you tube,

 

Paul

Posted
Its a good job blackboard rubbers were not triangular otherwise half of our class would have been blinded for life.!! And as for well aimed  chalk nearly as lethal as a bullet from a gun !!
Posted
In all this, one thing seems to have been forgotten - who threw the flapjack, from what distance and has he/she been signed up for the next Olympics?
Posted
You're all missing the point entirely ... what are they doing feeding flapjack to kids any way? All that sugar isn't good for them! Surely the should be having horse burgers? :D
Posted
Mel B - 2013-03-26 11:20 PM

 

You're all missing the point entirely ... what are they doing feeding flapjack to kids any way? All that sugar isn't good for them! Surely the should be having horse burgers? :D

 

Now that's just plain daft - whoever heard of a triangular horse burger? :-D

Posted
John 47 - 2013-03-27 10:00 AM

 

Mel B - 2013-03-26 11:20 PM

 

You're all missing the point entirely ... what are they doing feeding flapjack to kids any way? All that sugar isn't good for them! Surely the should be having horse burgers? :D

 

Now that's just plain daft - whoever heard of a triangular horse burger? :-D

 

 

 

They are as rare as a triangular horse.

 

:-|

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