International Terror Alerts

[Guest Frank Wilkinson]

New International Terror Alerts
The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to Peeved."

Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out.

Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France/>/> are "Surrender" and "Collaborate." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France/>/>'s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of alert.

Italy/>/> has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and
Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain:"Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels/>/>.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

 

[Dave Newell]

Love it Frank. ;-)

 

D.

[GJH]

Nice one - I really like the idea of the glass bottomed subs :-D

 

Graham

[michele]

Nice One Frank

;-)

[chas]

Your not planning on going to europe this year then Frank !

[Guest starspirit]

So much for the entente cordiale then Frank?

 

Perhaps we should make you our EU ambassador for peace and harmony, and sod the foreigners because Blitish is best.

[flicka]

Wonder what the Swiss or Swedes level are. i

Could i t would have to be "bury their heads in the sand"?

 

Flicka

 

[Vixters other half]

It would appear that the Americans are also up grading and honing the defensive status from "Shoot at anything" to "Fire at will".

 

Early indications suggest that Will is pretty Pi** ed off about it.

[Mel B]

The Americans would take a term from the Star Trekking song, as Captain Kirk would say "we come in peace ... shoot to kill!" (lol)