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gaz43

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Awwwww. Ambulance just stopped off on way to hospital (at home) to pick up letter from other hospital.... now going to hospital to see why not healing but sneaked a cheeky peek on here and missing you soooooooooooooooooo much. Thank you all. Will hopefully be up to driving later in week and get home to get on computer properly. Big big hugs..... lost loadsa weight but can't recommend the method :-D

 

Can't wait to hear what you all been up to... gotta dash as will be in biiiig trouble if they click what I'm doing ;-) Love to you all.... xxxxxxx

 

(Hmm face ache! Just you wait Janine.) x

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J9withdogs - 2008-10-28 6:20 PM

 

Have just heard from Joy and things not so good with her Mom at the moment.

 

She says to apologise to you all for not having thanked you individually for your kind thoughts.

 

never rains but it pours eh! Thinking of you Joy, wishing you all the best.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Just had a good long natter with Joy, she is at her mum & dads looking after them both, she is not able to get home to her computer, and is getting a bit better herself but still very dizzy and needing to rest herself, It makes me so cross that with her parent who both have dementia and cancer and Joy herself poorly and yet she is not able to get help, looking after them, the nurse pops in for 5 mins then goes not much help there, any one with any practical idea's who she should get in touch with to get a bit of help that I can pass on, you feel so helpless, surely there should be some agency to help. Carol. (sorry for the rant).
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Poor Joy - it is a common symptom of our caring socialist government and almost every local authority in the UK who throw hundreds of millions at the emotive and highly PC children and family care budgets but fail to allow enough money to care for the un PC elderly and infirm who do not have the strength and voice to complain loudly enough.

 

Joy should contact Social Services and INSIST that they do an assessment of needs.

 

Social Services may well resist due to 'budgetary' problems but it is her parents right to have help when it is needed even if they have to pay for it themselves if they are well off enough that is.

 

If they do stall Joy needs to ask for and note the name and job title of the obstructionist (good word eh!) and firmly and politely insist that that person will be held accountable for their refusal to help when the worst happens.

 

Other possible sources of good advice are Age Concern and Citizens Advice Bureau and their own GP should also be in on the act with full knowledge of how little support is actually being given.

 

Again always politely ask for names and job titles as it tends to focus the minds of those who generally like to be anonymous.

 

Please pass on Dot's and my own best wishes to Joy and wish her good luck.

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I'm sure there must be help available in Joys case.

Useful info could probably be found from one of the following contacts:

Age Concern

www.ace.org.uk ----------- Info line: 0800 00 99 66

 

or

 

Alzheimers Society

www.alzheimers.org.uk -------- Helpline: 0845 300 0336

 

Citizens Advice Bureaux numbers will be in local directories.

 

Also she should explain her predicament with her local health visitor, if she has not done so already.

 

I wish her well anyway, she always adds a cheery note to any thread.

 

:-|

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McMillan nurses can be quite good but they will only get as 'involved' as asked for with terminal cases, there seems to be a push on around our area by social services to ensure those in need get all they are entitled too, so contact them.
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So sorry to hear of Roon's continuing problems. Please pass on my very best wishes. With regards to help I nursed my 90 year old mother and any help I had did not come cheaply or usefully. In the end the "paid" people refused to come any more with the excuse that she was too heavy for them! Like Roon didn't matter about me although in the end the family doctor stepped in and sorted the problem. With my husband who was suffering from terminal cancer the Macmillan nurses were absolutely wonderful. Their involvement came through the intervention of the doctor and they worked tirelessly to care for him and because of this I managed to keep him at home. In addition they applied for a special weekly payment (I forget the name now) which was most welcome at that time. Obviously the NHS provision differs according to the location but maybe she could start by appealing to the doctor to arrange Macmillan involvement. They also kept in touch with me and the rest of the family for at least a year after his death. They arrange for financial advice if required and also counselling for the family, particularly the younger members of the family.

As you say the care for the elderly and sick and their carers in some areas of this country is disgusting now. In my area there are strong support groups for carers too although I did not have contact with them. That could be another avenue for her.

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Thanks for all the support, I am going to try and get as much information off everyone over the next few days put it all together and see if there is any help that Joy maybe able to get. Unfortunately I won't be able to do it until next the middle of next week as Ed's mum passed away this week and the funeral is on Monday so have been upset and sorting that out with Ed. but as Joy has no brothers or sisters and she is such a brilliant part of our forum feel if we can help we could try. By the way as usual she sent her love to everyone. Carol.
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As Richard said, Joy needs to kick up a fuss with the social services and keep on making a fuss until she gets some help. Our local hospital hasn't got a very good name but they have always done right by me and my family. When my wife was suffering from terminal cancer in 1998, a lady cunsellor at the hospital said we could have as much or as little help as we wanted. She said she could have carers at home 24 hours a day, seven days a week if we needed them. The Macmillan nurses would call in 2 or 3 times a week to monitor her pregress and arrange for any changes in her treatment. They obviously had to get the GP involved for morphine etc but they were the ones who managed the treatment.

 

When I developed Non Hodgkins Lymphoma a few years ago, the hospital acted really quickly to give me the treatment I needed. I had a Biopsy on New Years Eve 2002, I started Chemo within 2 weeks and the care and consideration was second to none . By July 2003, I had finished the treatment and touch wood, everyting is going to plan.

 

I think the treatment you get depends on the area and I think in some areas, you need to make a fuss before you get the treatment you deserve.

 

Hope you are feeling better soon Joy.

 

John.

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