the tortoise Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 Friendly types on here, aren't they? (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
howie Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 caraprof - 2007-07-19 8:37 AM Second best - what gives you that impression? It was obvious that our conversation was going nowhere and I sensibly decided that I was calling a halt to the argument. I asked him to justify certain remarks and he came out with the old line "I could refute your comments but I won't bother" (not exactly in those words, but you know what I mean!).You mustn't assume that because someone writes somelike like his last rather bullying rant against me that he's won anything. As I said, I could have replied but I'd already stated that I was out of it. I do not want to be banned for continuing with very long arguments!Its only natural that you do not wish to look as if you came off second best Frank but you must admit that your view of this matter would be biased, and in the cut and thrust of this debate most people would beg to differ and make Crinkly a clear winner. Nothing wrong with that and win some lose some always applies. I must admit to feeling slightly disappointed with the outcome though as i,ve always had considerable confidence in your ability come through any argument unscathed, but thats life I suppose.What does intrigue me is the very defensive attitude or putting others in their place so to speak that you take with most of your postings, and taking every opportunity to tell everyone how successfull you are. Mercedes, thriving business and always mixing with the right people are regularly thrown in, and always trying to impress others is a sure sign of insecurity or other possible inadequacies in your private life.Perhaps this forum is not the place to discuss such things, but let me just say, that along with many of the other users, a sympathetic response is always here for you if you so wish. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
howie Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 the tortoise - 2007-07-19 10:39 AM Friendly types on here, aren't they? (lol)Not as bad as it looks John and its time you came out of your shell a bit more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the tortoise Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 howie - 2007-07-19 11:22 AM What does intrigue me is the very defensive attitude or putting others in their place so to speak that you take with most of your postings, and taking every opportunity to tell everyone how successfull you are. Mercedes, thriving business and always mixing with the right people are regularly thrown in, and always trying to impress others is a sure sign of insecurity or other possible inadequacies in your private life.Perhaps this forum is not the place to discuss such things, but let me just say, that along with many of the other users, a sympathetic response is always here for you if you so wish.I have spent some time reading postings on various threads, and as a qualified relationship therapist, I would say that certain people have issues, and would benefit from counselling. I can recommend some UK-based therapists, if required. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michele Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 Syd, I,m smiling (lol) (lol) (lol) ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the tortoise Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 howie - 2007-07-19 11:22 AM What does intrigue me is the very defensive attitude or putting others in their place so to speak that you take with most of your postings, and taking every opportunity to tell everyone how successfull you are. Mercedes, thriving business and always mixing with the right people are regularly thrown in, and always trying to impress others is a sure sign of insecurity or other possible inadequacies in your private life. Perhaps this forum is not the place to discuss such things, but let me just say, that along with many of the other users, a sympathetic response is always here for you if you so wish. I have spent some time reading postings on various threads, and as a qualified relationship therapist, I would say that certain people have issues, and would benefit from counselling. I can recommend some UK-based therapists, if required. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
howie Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 Thats very kind of you John and having access to our very own inhouse therapist should prove invaluable. Doubt if many will require your services though as off hand I can only think of 20 or 30 users in need of urgent counselling. Don,t wish to sound presumptious, but knowing most of the users quite well please feel free if you need any inside information and we can then discuss the ins and outs of everyones business in the strictest confidence by p.m. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Syd Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 Hi to the tortoise I think I may well be a prime candidate for your counselling but here is my slant on these posts. You may understand what I mean after reading this Everyone lives within their own life (Kingdom) and within this life of theirs they build up and promote a picture of themselves that seldom includes any of their faults and failures, because they dont have any in this kindom of theirs, but it does include them seeing themselves as they would like others to see them, in a good light. Hence they see themselves as successful which of course they are, you have to be successful to survive and support your family at no matter at what level, in this day and age. The trouble comes when our own particular brand of "successful" is confronted by anothers particular brand of "successful". Our own particular brand of percieved "successful" has never been challenged or compared before because we are the only ones who have measured it and so it goes down badly when someone else comes along with a percieved brand of "successful" that makes us evaluate our own particular brand of "successful" in the light of the other persons brand of "successful" and we can come out feeling that maybe our brand of "successful" isnt all that successful after all, so we get shirty. Im "successful" and my brand of successful is just fine by my wife and myself, we are ok regardless. That shouldnt be taken as a brag, I am no better off than anyone else financially, but I have achieved happines Hope this makes sense and believe me this is not meant as a dig, jibe or as a putyoudown to anyone other than myself. Plese no one be offended Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the tortoise Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 That is very well observed Syd - do I see another professional here, or just a healthy interest in our fellow man? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thai Bry Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 Syd - 2007-07-19 12:56 PM Hi to the tortoise I think I may well be a prime candidate for your counselling but here is my slant on these posts. You may understand what I mean after reading this Everyone lives within their own life (Kingdom) and within this life of theirs they build up and promote a picture of themselves that seldom includes any of their faults and failures, because they dont have any in this kindom of theirs, but it does include them seeing themselves as they would like others to see them, in a good light. Hence they see themselves as successful which of course they are, you have to be successful to survive and support your family at no matter at what level, in this day and age. The trouble comes when our own particular brand of "successful" is confronted by anothers particular brand of "successful". Our own particular brand of percieved "successful" has never been challenged or compared before because we are the only ones who have measured it and so it goes down badly when someone else comes along with a percieved brand of "successful" that makes us evaluate our own particular brand of "successful" in the light of the other persons brand of "successful" and we can come out feeling that maybe our brand of "successful" isnt all that successful after all, so we get shirty. Im "successful" and my brand of successful is just fine by my wife and myself, we are ok regardless. That shouldnt be taken as a brag, I am no better off than anyone else financially, but I have achieved happines Hope this makes sense and believe me this is not meant as a dig, jibe or as a putyoudown to anyone other than myself. Plese no one be offended SydVery similar train of thoughts as to myself and my own outlook. Coming from Thailand, this is an outlook that we all take. The buddhist thought - and I've explained this on another thread - is that if we view ourselves as being successful, we are not jealous of people who are seen by others to be more successful than ourselves. If you are happy with the success that you've created for your own family, then that is reward enough.Again, this is just my view and beliefs and in no way is it aimed at anyone person or group of people in particular.Thai Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Syd Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 the tortoise - 2007-07-19 1:04 PM That is very well observed Syd - do I see another professional here, or just a healthy interest in our fellow man? No Professional here, just someone with a consuming intrest in most things, believe it or not I have lived my life completely back to front until 2004 when my dear wife's opinion finally prevailed and I saw the light. I have been a very forceful person in my life and made a LOT of enemies. I can now see that one catches more flies with honey than one ever will with vinegar, It is not big to humiliate someone but it is big to leave them with a face saving way out. I recognise peoples foilbles as the ones that I have and so try my best to make allowances for them where I can. Of course in my own inner world Im perfect and always right Thai Bry Cool man cool. Hope we get to meet sometime Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest caraprof Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 howie - 2007-07-19 11:22 AM caraprof - 2007-07-19 8:37 AM Second best - what gives you that impression? It was obvious that our conversation was going nowhere and I sensibly decided that I was calling a halt to the argument. I asked him to justify certain remarks and he came out with the old line "I could refute your comments but I won't bother" (not exactly in those words, but you know what I mean!).You mustn't assume that because someone writes somelike like his last rather bullying rant against me that he's won anything. As I said, I could have replied but I'd already stated that I was out of it. I do not want to be banned for continuing with very long arguments!Its only natural that you do not wish to look as if you came off second best Frank but you must admit that your view of this matter would be biased, and in the cut and thrust of this debate most people would beg to differ and make Crinkly a clear winner. Nothing wrong with that and win some lose some always applies. I must admit to feeling slightly disappointed with the outcome though as i,ve always had considerable confidence in your ability come through any argument unscathed, but thats life I suppose. What does intrigue me is the very defensive attitude or putting others in their place so to speak that you take with most of your postings, and taking every opportunity to tell everyone how successfull you are. Mercedes, thriving business and always mixing with the right people are regularly thrown in, and always trying to impress others is a sure sign of insecurity or other possible inadequacies in your private life. Perhaps this forum is not the place to discuss such things, but let me just say, that along with many of the other users, a sympathetic response is always here for you if you so wish. I can assure you Howie that the only reason that I mentioned what I did was because I was again stung by the remark from a waver, that because I don't wave I somehow don't have a life.My life is actually wonderful. Whether you like it or not I'm successful in my business, financially secure and extremely happy. I just object to the observations from all of the pro-wavers that we who think it a pain are somehow unpleasant and miserable buggers. All of the nastiness in this thread has come from pro-wavers. Look again at my first response to this thread. I wasn't unpleasant but merely wished to put my point.Michele doesn't like waving - are the pro-wavers suggesting that she is miserable and doesn't have a life? I can't think of anyone more full of fun and her life seems fascinating.The entire waving thread has one theme running through it - that because we don't agree with them, we are wrong, we are miserable, we don't have a life etc. etc.Well we do have a life and we are probably as kind and considerate as anyone else but because we think that waving is a mawkish and probably insincere gesture, we prefer not to bother. Isn't that our right! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest caraprof Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 the tortoise - 2007-07-19 12:12 PM howie - 2007-07-19 11:22 AM What does intrigue me is the very defensive attitude or putting others in their place so to speak that you take with most of your postings, and taking every opportunity to tell everyone how successfull you are. Mercedes, thriving business and always mixing with the right people are regularly thrown in, and always trying to impress others is a sure sign of insecurity or other possible inadequacies in your private life. Perhaps this forum is not the place to discuss such things, but let me just say, that along with many of the other users, a sympathetic response is always here for you if you so wish. I have spent some time reading postings on various threads, and as a qualified relationship therapist, I would say that certain people have issues, and would benefit from counselling. I can recommend some UK-based therapists, if required. That's very kind of you. Perhaps you can help me. I thought that I was a very happy person, happily married for thirty-odd years, a delightful daughter who's just graduated from a good university and most important of all, I enjoy excellent health.I've a very varied lifestyle and love travelling and am financially secure, although I no longer have to work.I thought that everything was going splendidly but now I'm having doubts. You see, the thing is that I'm not fond of this habit where some motorhomers think that they have to wave to me. I don't deny them that right, as I've said a few times, it's a free country but I don't want to wave back.Now there are lots of people who are telling me that because I don't like waving that I am, as one person so nicely put it, insane. Some have been less cruel but they all think that I (and others who feel as I do) are actually miserable and vindictive people and that because of this, we don't have a good life.I am now very confused. These people who wave say they do it because it's friendly, but their attitude to me and to others, including Michele who also doesn't like waving, is just the opposite of friendly. In fact they've been rather beastly to us.What should I do? I hope that you can throw some light on this as I'm becoming very worried. I genuinely thought that I was really happy and have a superb life, but now I'm being told that it's all a mirage.Please help me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michele Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 sorry I was trying to put something on it obviously did not work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest caraprof Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 I'd just like to add my measure of the word 'success' and it hasn't anything to do with money. Success is measured in only one thing in my opinion and that's happiness.I have very many friends most of whom are ordinary people and a few who are very rich. My closest friends are the ordinary ones and very often they seem the happiest. My greatest pleasure in life is my family and after that I think that health is incredibly important.As for me and my wealth, such as it is, I have to say that immediately after posting the remark this morning about my Mercedes I was regretting it, but I was dashing off to an important appointment and was spitting feathers because one correspondent signed off insinuating that she'd given in on trying to put me down for not waving, but then signed off with: "but a least I have a life."I was furious that just because I don't like waving some people just assume that I'm dull and miserable when nothing could be farther from the truth!As for my business etc. I was a member of this forum for a long time before I even mentioned what I do and this only came up because there was a discussion about cameras so I expressed an interest and mentioned what I do.I have never valued people on their wealth or position. Give me a poor but decent person any day over a rich and nasty one.Finally, once again, I know I like a good debate but this one has been really annoying. I've been amazed at the intolerance of those who brand us non-wavers as some kind of unfriendly and miserable individuals. I know the meaning of real friendship but I've never put much store by the modern, insincere 'have a nice day' culture that we've drifted into.Rant over! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Newell Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 I'm a waver but I respect, and will defend the right of those who chose not to wave without discrimination or derision. I've read this thread through and I have to say I think a lot of people have been rather unkind to Frank who has never once poured scorn and derision on those who wish to wave but has received little else in return. If you see me coming the other way and I wave I leave it entirely up to you as to whether or not you respond in kind and I promise to not think any less of you if you do not respond, I generally assume the non responders didn't see my cheery wave anyway. D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the tortoise Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 I'm beginning to get confused - why has this thread appear to have ended up in an argument about waving to one another? I have spotted at least two other threads which involve this theme, and it does seem to create a lot of angst amongst posters. This thread was headed keep on smiling. Is that also a problem for some motorhomers? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michele Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 Mr Tortoise , Go back and read it from the top and then you will see why it digressed to waving. Mr tortoise I am smiling as I write this Dave I think that they are very kind words indeed. And when a wrong has been done I think its more a measure of the person who can say so then people who sit in the background and say nothing ...If you see what I mean not infereing you have done any wrong ;-) (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Syd Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 Syd - 2007-07-19 12:56 PM Everyone lives within their own life (Kingdom) and within this life of theirs they build up and promote a picture of themselves that seldom includes any of their faults and failures, because they dont have any in this kindom of theirs, but it does include them seeing themselves as they would like others to see them, in a good light. Hence they see themselves as successful which of course they are, you have to be successful to survive and support your family at no matter at what level, in this day and age. The trouble comes when our own particular brand of "successful" is confronted by anothers particular brand of "successful". Our own particular brand of percieved "successful" has never been challenged or compared before because we are the only ones who have measured it and so it goes down badly when someone else comes along with a percieved brand of "successful" that makes us evaluate our own particular brand of "successful" in the light of the other persons brand of "successful" and we can come out feeling that maybe our brand of "successful" isnt all that successful after all, so we get shirty. Im "successful" and my brand of successful is just fine by my wife and myself, we are ok regardless. That shouldnt be taken as a brag, I am no better off than anyone else financially, but I have achieved happines Refering back to my earlier rant, This living a life within a life thing that I talked about, could this be construed as the following. I could be persuaded to think that there are many existances/lives being played out in this our existance time zone almost at the same time, say seconds, minutes or less either side of our current existance time zone. Could it be that our real lives are in one time zone and our life within our life, our dream/imaginatory life, is in another time zone but running sort of parallel. Does this make any sense at all, will be intresting to get some views if you have any. Dont worry, I go back to the hospital for my tablets tomorrow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the tortoise Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 Refering back to my earlier rant, This living a life within a life thing that I talked about, could this be construed as the following. I could be persuaded to think that there are many existances/lives being played out in this our existance time zone almost at the same time, say seconds, minutes or less either side of our current existance time zone. Could it be that our real lives are in one time zone and our life within our life, our dream/imaginatory life, is in another time zone but running sort of parallel. Does this make any sense at all, will be intresting to get some views if you have any. Dont worry, I go back to the hospital for my tablets tomorrow ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- So, perhaps, Syd you do not feel that you are always in the 'real' world as others may perceive it? Could it be that there are many time-zones that we may slip between in our lives, thus leaving knowledge in another time for others to pick up. Is it something that we can control, indeed manipulate for our own ends? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Syd Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 So, perhaps, Syd you do not feel that you are always in the 'real' world as others may perceive it? Could it be that there are many time-zones that we may slip between in our lives, thus leaving knowledge in another time for others to pick up. Is it something that we can control, indeed manipulate for our own ends? Edited by the tortoise 2007-07-19 6:35 PM Ouch tortoise A bit of a frank confession needed here but I am not going that far. Maybe, just maybe, I think I think, that everyone makes these trips, of varying lengths, to various other zones, as a normal course of living, either conciously or unconciously, admittedly or unadmittedly, and our trips into these other time zones, and the successes that we may have in there, massaging our inner ego's or whatever else it may be that we do there, are what gives us the personal confidence to take the decissions that we have to take in this time zone. Indeed maybe even control our whole disposition. How do we explain our knowing what is going to happen next or knowing that we have been there before or even knowing that we have done this thing before. Have we experienced it previously in another zone. Can it all be explained by something after death ?? ie living again sort of a second try/chance This discussion is getting onto new ground and I am suprising myself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel B Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 ... A man once said to me "Smile and be happy", things could be worse. So I smiled and was happy ... and things did get worse! (lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the tortoise Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 How do we explain our knowing what is going to happen next or knowing that we have been there before or even knowing that we have done this thing before. Have we experienced it previously in another zone. Can it all be explained by something after death ?? ie living again sort of a second try/chance This discussion is getting onto new ground and I am suprising myself Good for you Syd, it does us all good to stretch the old grey cells occasionally! I have long held the belief that time travel is a reality - Da Vinci's designs, 'runways' on top of mountains in South America, deja vu, etc. There are a lot of people who say it doesn't exist, but no-one has PROVED it doesn't exist! I must away for a couple of hours - unfortunately there are quite a few troubled souls in Spain who haven't found their Eldorado, and need a bit of help from me to put things back into perspective! Speak later, I hope Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Syd Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 Hi tortoise Dont bother going to Spain Ive just been there and fixed it mate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davenewellhome Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 What are you two on? Please tell, 'cause I want some! >:-) ,D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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